If you like being alone, or crave some time to spend with no company other than yourself, if you feel tired after interacting with people (yes, saying hello to people counts as interaction, too), then you are a certain introvert.
I am an introvert myself, while some of (okay, most of) the people I know are extroverts. While I envy their ability to conduct small talk about the weather or some such trivial thing, I really don’t go for it myself. As easy as they find it to be in the midst of a crowd, I feel tired after an outing. So here’s how being an introvert feels like to me:
No small talk for me
I know you are trying to be nice and get a few words out of my mouth. But I don’t do small talk, okay? I seem to have this peculiar ability of forgetting absolutely everything when I meet someone new, and that includes forgetting my name, language of communication, the fact that I can actually talk – literally everything. So, unless you have something profound to say about books or black holes, please don’t try to engage me in small talk. Please.
No phone calls either
Why, just why would you call, when you can say whatever you want to say through a message? Before putting through a call to an introvert, ask yourself the following questions:
- Is it possible to convey the information through some other media? Message, Telegram, WhatsApp, Facebook messenger, email or a handwritten letter?
- Can the conversation still take place?
- Can your question(s) be answered through said media?
If the answer to these questions is yes, please don’t call. I can chat continuously on any social messenger service for hours, bit I cannot face a phone call, unless it is a matter of utmost importance. Message. It’s better, right?
It’s my “blank face”
I’ve often come across people judging me because I don’t speak. For all those who think I have an attitude, here goes:
Guys, this is just my face when I’m totally blank inside. There’s nothing going on within my brain. It is zapped. I don’t have an attitude. I’m not a bitch for not responding to your attempts to talk, I swear. This face is just probably me wondering when I’ll get home.
No offense to you, really.
Not all introverts are bookworms
Ah! This one gets a special mention here, because people seem to assume automatically that if you are an introvert, you love being with your books (and coffee, and a cat, somehow).
Now, I admit that I am a total bookworm. But I know people who are introverts and, surprise! not bookworms. They love watching TV or Netflix, sleeping or even spending time outside, alone or in the midst of nature.
Next time it’s an introvert’s birthday, don’t gift them a book without knowing if they really like reading or not. Because, being introverts, they’ll never tell you they didn’t read it, and they’ll avoid you for the rest of their lives lest you ask them about the book.
Well, I am known to have completely different behaviours among best friends and others, and I’m sure most of my fellow introverts are like this too. I have a handful of besties, as you call your best friends, and I can let my hair down with them in ways I can never do in front of others (Read about Female friendships here). My world is clearly divided into two parts – best friends and others. Everyone, absolutely everyone who’s not my best friend goes into the “others” category. They may be family, just friends, acquaintances, colleagues – anyone who’s not a best friend is an Other. And I can literally exhibit two different types of behaviour between these two categories. And if these categories were to come in contact with each other, I retreat into my shell till it is safe to crawl out again.
How many of you recognize with me? If you do, hello there fellow introvert! We make up for about 25% of the population, so yay! we are the rarer species! Being an introvert is fine. It’s not a bad quality, however much people (read, extroverts) want to make it one. It’s all about preferences. You prefer your own company over others, and that’s fine. Don’t let anybody tell you otherwise. You don’t have to change yourself to fit in to the society norms. You are your own BAE, be proud of it.
So next time when you are invited for a party, instead of being depressed about it, accept your inner introvert goddess and sit at home!